Posted on January 2, 2018
Yes. I am going to start posting something everyday this year- it could be a review, an article, an editorial, or even a sandwich! How exciting!
Anyway, the future looks pretty bleak. A man who took two scoops of ice cream instead of one is president, Hollywood is STILL making movies, and I’m still alive! What the hell! I’m pretty sure I should be dead by now- you did see my Super Mario 64 DS review, right?
I digress, as I am supposed to be making some predictions about what is going to happen this year. So let’s get on to my terrible predictions- can you guess which ones might actually come true?
- EA screws up…. AGAIN! EA will screw up somehow royally this year. They’ll probably start by reinstating microtransactions in Star Wars Battlefront II, and mess up even more by going back on their world about free DLC for the game- yes, there just that bad!
- Destiny 2 will somehow get even worse! Don’t know what it will be exactly, but I think Bungie will find a way to mess up Destiny 2 even more! It will probably happen around the time the 2nd expansion comes out, and this time the playbase will not sit ideally by- there will be a mass exodus of player’s after this f@#k-up. Mark my words! (Maybe)
- Nintendo will show a new trailer for Metroid Prime 4 and other IPs. At E3 2018, Nintendo will once again blow everyone away by showing off the first footage of Metroid Prime 4. I don’t know what other games will be shown off, but I’ll guess a new F-zero, Mario Party switch, and Animal Crossing switch, as well as DLC for Mario Odyssey that recreates Super Mario 64 in Odyssey’s engine.
- More games plagued by issues at launch! This is inevitable, but games like Sea of Thieves, Anthem and other big name games of 2018 will be plagued with issues at launch, so much so that the games will be unplayable for days. These games will also be barebones at launch, with new content being added every few weeks. God, I hate the state of gaming now…
- More Microtransactions! Games like The Crew 2 and Red Dead Redemption 2 will have microtransactions- especially the later. In fact, RDR 2 will be heavily criticized for it’s multiplayer, as it is going to be a mess at launch.
- People will try to make Far Cry 5 controversial and fail. Don’t know if you heard, but people think Far Cry 5 is racist as it portrays Christians as evil bible thumpers who kill others if they don’t believe them. This year, when the game comes out, people will try to, and ultimately fail to try and claim the game is controversial. Also, the game will get a 81 on Metacritic.
- What will be the best games of 2018? Red Dead Redemption 2, God of War ’18, Dragonball Fighterz, and Shadow of the Colossus remake will get glowing reviews across the board. You heard it hear first, I guess!
- What will be the losers of 2018? Anthem, Dynasty Warriors 9, Metal Gear Survive, Sea of Thieves, Crackdown 3, and the Crew 2 will all be let downs in some shape or fashion, and be considered either the worst or at the very least most disappointing games of the year. The saddest will be the new Spiderman game, which will actually divide both players and critics.
- Even more announcements! During E3 or sometime this year, the following games will be announced- Forza Horizon 4, Halo 6, New Darkstalkers game, either Starfield of Elder Scrolls 6 from Bethesda (don’t know which) and Doom 2, among other surprises, like Madden 19 and a new Call of Duty (oh wait….)
- Announced games finally get some footage! Games like the Resident Evil 2 remake and the Final Fantasy VII remake will finally get trailers and gameplay footage. Kojima will finally give us gameplay for Death Stranding- at the Game of the Year Awards 2018!
- Someone will do something cringy at both AGDQ 2018 and SGDQ 2018. Do I really have to put this here- you know those goofballs are gonna do something wacky!
- Yet another tragedy will be blamed on video games. I know this one’s pretty morbid, but another tragedy is going to occur, and video games will be blamed. This time, its going to be Overwatch of all games.
- The UK will (or try to) ban Detroit: Become Human. Mostly because they are a bunch of weenies. Thankfully, many people will be against it, so theres that.
- Finally, this blog will be shut down by the FBI or CIA– for what reason, nobody knows! Probably something for all the illegal pictures I have of Al Franken on my computer. Better go delete those….
- Oh, and at least 20 men who work in Hollywood will be ousted as sexual predators- not video games, but it will happen. Like, duh!
So this is what I think will happen this year in video gaming. I know it sounds pessimistic, but I’m a very pessimistic person, so yeah.
At the end of the year, I’ll see which of these came true and post how wrong I was.
What do you think? Are video game finally dead? Please leave a comment below!