Review: Postal 2

Review: Postal 2

A game about some guy, just trying to get though the week, just like the rest of us…

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Year: 2003

Played on: PC via Steam

Also: Linux

Developer: Running with Scissors

Publisher: Whiptail Interactive, Running with Scissors (Digital Versions)

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“This can’t be good for me, but I feel great!”

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Date posted: October 19, 2017

Postal_2_cover

PREMISE

People are probably wondering my political views. Who did I vote for this last election- Hillary or Trump? The answer is clear- Charles Heston. After voting for him, I exclaimed “Come get your rebate, you damn filthy apes!” which was really awkward, because it was held outside a Tyler Perry movie.

Let’s talk about video game violence. *crickets chirp for 30 minutes straight* Okay, now that we talked about video game violence, lets talk about a violent video game I enjoyed. Yes, I know, I’m probably going to be locked up after this review, but I take solstice in the fact that I can make my opinions known.

Postal 2 is a very family friendly game. You live out a 5 or 7 day week as a character only known as “The Postal Dude”, who goes around doing responsible tasks for his very loving wife. These include, getting milk, picking up your paycheck, getting a book signed by Gary Coleman, pissing on your father’s grave, and killing terrorists, just to name a few. Along the way, you’ll meet all kinds of ruffians and Ne’er-do-well’s, such as violent video game protesters, PETA, elephants, zombies, the army, the police, and rednecks. Oh, and Gary Coleman.

 

20171019140145_1
Yep. Nothing out of the ordinary here! Just a man and his scissors!

 

PROS

There is good variety of weapons here. Axe body spray can be used as a flamethrower. Cats can be used as silencers (RIP MR FLUFFERNUTTER 2006-2009) The melee weapons are fantastic- my favorite being the scythe, which lets you slice people in half, then lop off all their limbs. Fun for the whole family! You also have your basic guns- a pistol, shotgun, AK47, etc. On Saturday and Sunday, you get access to weapons like the Nuke and WMD launcher, which are incredibly dangerous to use.

You also have many items to use, including health-pipes, bags of fast food, donuts, doggy treats, and cat nip.

The first five days of the game is the base game. It is an almost-open world environment, (damn loading screens!) where you choose which way you want to go to your next destination. There is a lot of variety here, as you can freely explore the town of Paradise. An Arcade, a mall, a church and more can be explored, many items and secrets can be find that can help you in your daily routine.

 

20171019140216_1
As you can see, there is lot of variety in the game’s map. But where the hell is Wal*Mart?

 

The game’s first expansion, Apocalypse Weekend is different. The game is now more linear, as you make your way though different set pieces- at one point, your in a Chinese restaurant killing zombies, next thing you know, your gunning down elephants. You also have hallucinations of Gary Coleman zombies as they throw grenades and scissors at you. You can’t make this s@#t up!

 

postal_2_screenshot_8937ddc4I wonder if he knew that this game would be part of his legacy…

 

The Postal Dude also has a lot of one-liners, and kind of remind of Duke Nukem, if Duke was down on his luck and was angry all the time. He has a lot of personality and wit, you know, for a complete psychopath.

However, the best part of the game, by far, is that you don’t have to kill a single person (Well, in the base game anyway) A passive/pacifist playthough is possible.This makes it ironic, then, when you hear that this game has been banned in various countries for its violent and disgusting content.

Countries where this game has been banned from:

  • New Zealand
  • Australia
  • Malaysia
  • Germany (Temporarily)
  • Sweden (Temporarily)

Another big pro for me- even though the game was released in 2003, the original devs have re-released the game and are still updating it. In fact, in 2015, they even made a new expansion for it. Now that’s dedication! More devs should be like RWS- complete and utter psychopaths with hearts of gold.

Also, there is a dedicated piss button, though that may be a con for some people.

CONS

My biggest gripe is the loading screens in the first five days. It’s annoying when you find out your going the wrong way to your destination, so you have go back to face another loading screen. Ironically, the last two days, Saturday and Sunday, are too linear, and while it has its moments, it can get boring- notably the Military base, which feels like a half-baked half-life mod.

It’s politically incorrect nature may be a turn off for some. Terrorists are stereotyped as wearing turbans and praising Allah. Dogs and cats can be killed. Protesters are shown to be violent and barbaric. Poor Gary Coleman is made out to be some insane thug. Postal Dude says things like “I guess if would be politically incorrect if I don’t kill the women and minorities first!” and “I’m an equal opportunity killer!”. In other words, no weenies allowed!

 

Untitled 11The game gives you fair warning that it’s not for everyone.

 

Also, there is no music. I have no idea if my copy was bugged, or if this was design choice. Its not a deal breaker, but I just find it weird.

FINAL VERDICT

Postal 2 is a game that doesn’t give a s#@t, and that’s why I love it. It is the ultimate expression of freedom in video games, and does what ever in the hell it wants, and allows the player to do the same. It may have some problems, and may be incredibly politically incorrect, but I think that’s why a lot of people love it, including me. Only play if you don’t have a bleeding heart.

5score

Agree? Disagree? Good! Leave a comment about how terrible my taste is in the comments below!

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